Adjusting to Four

Can I be honest? 

I was nervous about having our fourth child. 

I was wondering how I was going to be able to handle 4.

I've heard some mothers say that adjusting to their 3rd child was the hardest transition and I've heard others say the same about their 4th.

I'm so grateful that I didn't feel that way about having our third child since we were living in a camper at the time of her birth and Nathan was in the heart of building our house.

But knowing the arrival was soon approaching for our 4th child to join our family I faced a lot of fear. 

I think part of my concern was the fact that Janessa was going to be only 20 months old when the new baby arrived. 

She was still a baby!  And now I was going to have another one.  How was I possibly going to get around?

Not to mention that my oldest is only 5.  That's a lot of littles to manage on my own.

And what about feeding.  There's so much time spent feeding the new baby, how was I going to manage the other 3.  One of which is still in need of a lot of training.

These were just some of my concerns. 

I was very overwhelmed.

Even the birthing process scared me like I've never been before.

All these fears I had to take before the Lord and ask for His help.  I had to put my trust in Him knowing that it's through Him that I can do all things. 

It wasn't going to happen if I tried to do it on my own, in my own strength.

I was aware, yet again, of my desperate need for Him. 

And I am so thankful that He is our Helper, that He is always faithful, He's our ever present help in our time of need. 

The birth was a precious experience, leaning on the Lord like I've never done before through my deliveries.

Janessa, our third child, absolutely loved her baby brother right from the start, as well as Zeke and Kenzie.  This made the transition so much easier. 

And low and behold, I had to stand in line to hold my own baby for the first time.  I realized that I had capable helpers this time around!  What a blessing!  For me and for baby.

And those fears of 'what if' began to dwindle as the Lord showed me His strength. 

Of course I absolutely love that Nathan could be home for the first week as we all adjusted but then as he went back to work and I was left on my own I realized my fears were greater than reality. 

I truly had nothing to fear if I turned to the Lord for help.  And help He did. 

I even made it to a doctors appointment with all four kids by myself that first week and we all survived.  Not just survived, but it went smooth and everyone did great.  It was possible to get around with 4 littles.  (Our double stroller came in handy once again!)

My baby has even napped on the same schedule as my others almost right off the bat.  Whaaat?! 

All these little things were unexpected blessings.

And I am so thankful for our precious bundle of joy.  He is such a sweet added blessing to our family and we are all head over heels in love with him!

Here are some pictures from the first month of our little Eli!